On the 22/7/16 I wrote – sometimes being wise means pushing past the gunk of your day and choosing to love. Choosing to love God and spend time with him when all you want to do is watch TV (who doesn’t love the Kardashian’s right?). But I promise when you give Jesus a little he gives you a lot. Keep pushing through . Keep working to stay in his presence for that extra minute. Keep going.
22/7/16 Shannon wrote that from God to the 6/9/16 Shannon. I say that because today I sat down to write this blog post and if I’m honest I really didn’t want to. I wanted to hide under a pillow and go to sleep for a year. This is my second day of school and it’s been hard. Real life hard people. It’s hard when you had all summer full of free time to pursue God and then all of sudden you have little time. It’s hard to hear his voice past the busy corridors, shouting teachers and canteen ques. It’s even harder to hear his small voice over the large one sitting in the corner that consists of a planner with a list and some text books that you really don’t want to touch.
But hear me and hear me clearly when I say this… you are not alone. No matter how old you are its ok to not know what you want to do with your whole life. It’s ok to find things hard, it’s ok to question yourself. As long as you don’t stay there.
God’s voice may not be louder but it is stronger and always will be stronger. God’s voice may be hard to find but it is always there. He is always there. Trust even when your world feels like its shaking. Trust even when you don’t trust yourself. Trust because he is always faithful.
As I think over my summer I ponder all the beautiful people and faces I’ve seen. I think over every heart that has touched mine whether big or small. The choices I’ve made. Sometimes right yet often wrong – and all I can help myself but think is that greater is to come, greater is to be done and that gets me quite excited.
I now know I will work on the mission field for this yearning in my heart that calls for home wherever that might be, cannot be comforted by thousands of memories and cannot be consoled by the common Irish rain.
I am heavens girl. A girl designed to travel through life with maybe no nationality other than that. The nationality of heaven. That shall forever be my identify. That shall be forever my calling place. My one true home. for when I think of this place my passion although maybe it only be small – God reignites and a fire that once burned bright continues to smoulder – for one day my calling will be fulfilled – one day I will walk through those pearly gates and call upon my lord and master and he shall say it is finished, I am finished and he will look upon me and say bless you my good and faithful servant who gave all I gave you.
But until that day I will continue to stop for that one more, will look like a failure in the eyes of the world, I will deem no job to low, no penny lost, no tear shed in vein, no money squandered – for I will give all I am, all I have and all I ever will be to advance the kingdom set before me. For I have counted the cost and nothing is worth more. One day all these faces will gaze upon mine on the other side and be there because of God first… but I will play a part as I sacrifice more, chose to be more obedient and be a faithful follower of God. My prayer is you will too.
All that will be left will be to eternally rest in his forever faithful arms. but until then I will pursue to be of value to this world and not to be a success in this world. I will know who calls me over what I am called too and I will chose him over anything set before me.
Rest in him. Rest in the knowledge you are not alone. Rest in knowing every season has a price but also a reward. Rest in knowing God covers your past, present and future in promise. Rest in knowing he has paid it all.